"A Hard Rain's Gonna Fall"'s prophecy is now fulfilled
This week has really been something. There's nothing like getting a non-covid shock in the middle of all of this. One of my daughters had been itching her head a lot, and we thought it was dry scalp, which is an issue she's had in the past. As you have probably guessed, it was lice.
We had an all-hands on deck emergency that disrupted the home schooling schedule and pushed me to the brink. I spent the entire day furiously cleaning and doing laundry along with going through my wife's hair and searching for lice. She did most of the tough work of doing the lice combing with our daughters, who spent a lot of time crying in pain. That was fun. In the end only one of my daughters had lice and as of today both are totally louse and nit free.
My wife and I have joked about learning the origins of certain cliches: "fine tooth comb," "nit-picking," "lousy" etc. Monday was tough but we came out of it with a feeling of accomplishment. This whole experience is awful but it least has brought home how much I love my family.
I am starting to notice things I didn't before. While my commute is grueling, I have transformed it into quiet reading time for myself. I rarely get a minute of solitude now, and it's really beginning to wear on me.
Today I learned someone I love has cancer and my wife was kind enough to let me get out of the house to be alone. I walked three miles in cold drizzle. I listened to Dylan's "It's A Hard Rain's Gonna Fall" multiple times. His prophecy is being fulfilled. I prefer the amped up version from the 1975 Rolling Thunder tour, which sounds appropriately furious at a society bringing doom upon itself.
I have been feeling alternately depressed and full of rage. This week the president seems to have decided on letting the virus burn through society and kill all so his bottom line can be increased. Republicans and Fox News are lining up behind this, treating the nation's elderly like kamikaze pilots ready to sacrifice for the God Emperor. In trying to craft an economic response, Congress is stymied by Republicans who think the current bill is too good to workers.
It is obvious to me now more than ever that this country cannot survive. Unless the scourge of this virus kills me I am completely confident that I will outlive this republic. All of the stuff eating away at our society has been exposed: our horrible inequality, our lack of respect for human life, our inability to sacrifice, the undemocratic nature of our political process, and most of all, the attitude of right wing Bolsheviks who would rather destroy the country than give up control. That chaotic, destructive faction runs riot by manipulating the democratic process and by having such a pathetic opposition. Even after all this the liberals are still weak and leftists are engaging in a circular firing squad.
There's no point in comtemplating this stuff because I start to spiral. I should be focused right now on my family, and in a few days, teaching my kids. However, I can't help myself. I called Ben Sasse's office to tell him to knock off his bullshit. I've been writing stuff like this and a couple of other essays. To shrink from a fight right now, no matter how impossible it is, is something I just don't have in me. I know I will likely kick myself for that later.
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