Trump Possibly Secures Presidency In Unprecedented Scenes In Washington
January 4, 2017
America has had contested election results before, in both 1876 and 2000, but nothing like in 2016. As in both of those elections, the Republican candidate lost the popular vote, but ended up winning the election, and in both cases it was had to be decided outside of the voters or Congress.
It was clear on election night that Trump did not have a majority of popular votes. Voters in populous blue states like California and Trump's native New York made sure of that. However, the electoral vote came down to a small number of swing states. Controversial voter ID laws in several states, including Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Wisconsin, Missouri, and Florida, were credited for Trump's victories there. In Ohio lines to vote in many urban areas lasted eight hours. In many areas voters complained of harassment by the Real Americans, a pro-Trump militia formed after an assassination attempt on the candidate in September. (His opponents called it a staged ploy, and the circumstances are still murky.) Some precincts in Florida supposedly had their ballot boxes stuffed by Real American operatives, but Florida governor Rick Scott has refused to investigate. Similarly, the North Carolina state government has refused to look into allegations of voter intimidation.
The Clinton campaign contested the results in several states. Attempting to sort it out, the Supreme Court met at the end of December, but deadlocked on a 4-4 decision, owing to the fact that Republicans in Congress have still not approved an Obama administration nominee. For over a week the capital stood in a state of suspended animation. Finally, this morning a brigade of Real Americans, escorted by members of the armed forces, marched on and occupied that capitol while Congress was debating possible solutions to the electoral impasse.
Democrats and anti-Trump Republicans are reported to have been taken to an undisclosed location. A certain Colonel Pride of the marines has reportedly called Congress back into session, with the new rump Congress approving a hastily drawn up resolution calling for Trump to be installed as the next president of the United States. There is still no word as to whether these soldiers had orders from higher up on the chain of command. There has also been no word from President Obama, who has been away from Washington at Camp David. Speculation is rising that he has been put under detention by military authorities, but there still has been no firm word yet.
Neither Trump nor his representatives has yet said anything, but reliable sources report that he has left his Florida home and will soon be flying to Washington this evening, where Real Americans have planned a torchlit parade down the National Mall. Anonymous sources in the Clinton camp acknowledge that the former Secretary of State may be contemplating self-imposed exile. At this hour there is a state of confusion in the capital, where tanks and armed guards have been appearing on the streets.